According to Cigna’s U.S. Loneliness Index, nearly half of Americans report sometimes or always feel alone. A quarter of Americans rarely or never feel as though there are people that understand them, and a fifth report they rarely or never feel close to people. The report says that finding a balance of work, exercise, sleep, […]
I publish a variation of this article every year on January 24 because it seems to make people feel better. The Axis of Evil According to Dr. Cliff Arnalls, a British psychologist with Cardiff University, a number of factors coincide to make January 24th the most depressing day of the year: It’s dark. Not as […]
In the fourth grade, my grandmother sewed Halloween costumes for me and my twin sister. I went as a nun and she as a jailbreaker. The costumes were appropriate then and for the next three decades. I followed every rule and she broke them. At age two, when she was still in diapers, she packed […]
Several people have written to me lately to say they are in a debilitating depression and are running out of hope. I thought I’d share a message of hope with them and with everyone who is currently battling the beast. Dear Depressed Person, I know that you can’t feel anything. You might not even be […]
In a recent Guideposts article, I compared the year of 2018 to the worst English paper I ever turned in, on the life of Mary Todd Lincoln. Totally uninspired, I began each sentence with “Mary Todd Lincoln” and earned a D. The great thing about a new year, though, is that you begin fresh with […]
I’ve noticed a pattern to my attitude about starting a new year. The harder the year prior, the more I look forward to January 1. It’s like turning in a really bad English paper and getting to start over on a new assignment. A blank page and a new year give us the one ingredient […]
George Burns once said: “Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family… in another city.” That would explain why the holidays are so stressful. Those dear relatives who live in San Francisco suddenly are lingering in front of your refrigerator in Cincinnati and you have to figure out a socially acceptable way of setting […]
I had the opportunity to be interviewed by Terry Gilberg, host of Think! America national radio show last week about strategies to combat holiday depression. I mostly focused on the first point of my seven strategies below, to allow yourself to feel all the emotions of the holidays, not excluding sadness. For highly-sensitive folks and […]
Every December, I send poinsettias to a number of business acquaintances whom I respect. It’s a networking gesture I learned from my dad. Last night I compiled my list of colleagues for this year’s batch. However, this morning I had a change of heart. I decided instead to send flowers to a handful of people […]
Back before there were psychiatrists and therapists, way before the introduction of Prozac and Xanax, people were using mantras to calm their nervous systems and sooth symptoms of depression and malaise. In fact, the earliest mantras were used by Hindus more than 3,000 years ago. Employed by Buddhists, Christians, Taoists, and persons of most faith […]
Mahatma Gandhi once said, “My imperfections and failures are as much a blessing from God as my successes and my talents and I lay them both at his feet.” In the last few months, I have been trying to follow Gandhi’s example by presenting God with all of my humiliations, rejections, and shortcomings and to […]
“Friendship isn’t about who you’ve known the longest. It’s about who walked into your life, said ‘I’m here for you,’ and proved it.” – Unknown I came across that quote the other day and how appropriate it is right now. I am humbled and touched by the outpouring of emails, comments, and snail mail in […]
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom” wrote Anais Nin. For me that day happened last July. I was vacationing with my family in Corolla, South Carolina, when all the pain I had been feeling for the last year bubbled to […]
Dear Suicidal Person, I write this in the midst of suicidal ideations myself. I’ve been battling them off and on over the last six months. They were so intense in August I was almost hospitalized and again last week. In the recent past, I haven’t publicized my struggle because I didn’t want those around me […]
Musician and songwriter Willie Nelson once said, “When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around.” Study after study on gratitude shows how simple exercises of appreciation build emotional resilience, improve our relationships, and promote our well-being. Gratitude researchers like Martin Seligman, PhD, director of the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia; Robert […]
Evolutionary biologist and animal behavioral specialist Marc Bekoff, PhD, once said that “play is training for the unexpected.” And psychiatrist and play expert Stuart Brown, MD, said, “Those who play rarely become brittle in the face of stress or lose the healing capacity for humor.” I’m beginning to think that playing can even access parts of our brain that […]
Middle schoolers aren’t the only ones who feel the jitters as school reopens every year. Most people I know have trouble as summer draws to a close and autumn begins. All of the stress and transition required to accommodate new schedules, activities, and schools can throw off the limbic system (your emotional center) of even the […]
If you live in or near the Baltimore area, come celebrate NAMI Metropolitan Baltimore’s 35th Anniversary of service. The performance features six storytellers who share their experience living with — or loving someone with — a mental health condition. Through powerful anecdotes, original music, and poetry, the storytellers will share their journeys through challenges and […]
One definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, each time expecting different results. It’s like that infuriating toy grabber claw arcade game where all you have to do is cinch the claw at the right time and the cute stuffed pig or octopus is yours. Oh! —there it goes!, you […]
“There is no coming to consciousness without pain,” remarked the Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung. “People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own Soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” Having started therapy a month ago, I […]
